the world of the welch
The Sam has managed to get hold of Spider Man. Not that we are anti-superhero, we just haven’t added any to the collection of household media. Unfortunately Sam has filled in the gaps with some serious misinformation. We are going to have to have a re-education plan in place. I do prefer Batman and the eventual introduction of Catwoman as the perfect woman but we will work with what we have. Until that time, well, you’ll see.
Spider Man from tim welch on Vimeo.
This one is old and only in honor of The Sam’s campaign to extend Christmas and make the fat bastard [his words, not mine] come back and drop more toys off. Everyday. Nevermind the torturous affair of waking up from a lazy Sunday afternoon nap to find that some crook stole the tree and stockings. He erupted after an induced Grinch-like flashback. The Sam now wonders the house mumbling “Where is that Fat Bastard… and baby Jesus”. Good Catholic.
In prepping for Halloween, Christina drug out all the remotely connected Halloween books for The Sam. Turns out the only one he dug was something about a “Very Scary” pumpkin. That became the buzz phrase for most of October. Anything sort of Halloween is was preceded by “very Scary”. Of course, in two year old fashion it was his very scary pumpkin. Here is his very scary pumpkin that he helped carve with his mommy.
LIFE: Boxes For Babies – Hosted by Google.
It seems like abuse at first glance, that is why I couldn’t help to post it but when you read more, it makes sense. It is for cold weather and is climate controlled to keep from having to over clothe the kid. Not really the hamster thing it looks like. But imagine the looks from family and friends when they see it for the first time. Worth the price. Getting one next Wednesday!!
This cupcake is about to die. It doesn’t know it yet. It is going to be gruesome. One that its mother will not be allowed to identify its wrapper. The trial will have to be moved to find an impartial jury. It will be done to the soundtrack of the joyous howls of the criminal. With flip and flourish this poor bastard is going to be dismantled and obliterated. Matter of fact I think Sam just whispered “Say a prayer to your cupcake god because you are about to leave your mortal coil and join the party in my tummy.” [A little YGG reference for you toddler hipsters]
Chicken Little wanted to play in the water so bad. But then Sam spent twenty five minutes running from it. Barely a drop landed on him the whole time. Instead he just waved at the spouts and ran like a monkey from any that actually threatened coming within ten feet. I love this one though, it is as if he made a water bubble explode by expertly nailing it with a rock. Toddler wonder powers.
Sam and Grandpa in stride. Like they own the place. Neither knowing where the hell they’re going. Three steps later Grandma and I are yelling “Hey, over here. Yo. Back here.” Of course the place turns to see the ass clowns that just lost there family. Or to make sure it wasn’t their family yelling.
Two must be terrible. We meet the monster at dinner. The cute, smiley bundle of joy from earlier in the day has nothing to say but “NOOOOOOOO” and specializes in full fledged body flops at the very mention of the “D” word. What he is really trying to say with these fits is:
“You bastards, I told you that my stomach has not eaten my lower intestine yet, so there for I can not be hungry yet. Besides, this is just a trick to make me a slobbed up mess and force me into the bath which is just prelude to the night time jail cell you call bedtime. Idiots, Obama has already outlawed torture and you will be prosecuted.”
So now we negotiate for each consecutive bite. Adults with advanced degrees holding a chip and repeating “Just one more bite, no a whole bite. Gotta swallow. No don’t spit it out. You wanna chip?” We still are paying off student loans. We were ripped off.
Grandma and Grandpa Welch sent cards that rocked Sam’s world. Sam got one that sang “So Happy Together”. He was a bit excited.
Noodle Sam from tim welch on Vimeo.
Sam, who has a sore throat, got some nifty noodles for dinner. He had some creative methods. He also gives his review of the food at the end
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